91 - Celebrate Life

Dear David,

My Aunt Pauline passed away last week, and I went to say goodbye to her this past weekend. She was my Aunt, but she was also Grandma' sister. What's more, is that they were twin sisters, so it was very hard for Grandma to say goodbye to her.

Grandma wrote a lovely letter to celebrate the life of her sister, her twin. I thought I'd save it for you.

Love,

Daddy


"Today is a difficult time for everyone. We are saddened by the death of my twin sister, my best friend, and my confidant.

I could stand here all day and talk about her, where she was born, what kind of childhood we had together, her flaws, her strengths, but that is not what I want to talk about today. There is one thing that I need to focus on and that is she suffered many hardships gracefully and with courage and that she is at peace with our lord.

I feel blessed to have had such a close relationship: I can see her now as a young girl while we both struggled together in boarding schools in Canada and new Hampshire. We were always so close. The one thing that I regret is that we were always referred to as “the twins”. We had separate identities, which wasn't always acknowledged.

We were often regarded as the opposite twins, only because I inherited all of my mother’s characteristics and she resembled my father. She was a Leduc and I was Faubert. She had a beautiful voice and she was often asked to sing for my aunts. She took great pleasure in listening to the music of the forties and fifties later in life.

When I married in 1950, there was never a doubt that I would ask her to do me the honor of being my maid of honor. And in 1953 when she married Normand, I was to be her matron of honor. She was also godmother to mark, my first-born and I, godmother to Lori.

As you know, Pauline spent the better part of her life as a mother to her 3 children, Gary, Neil and Lori. We shared the joys and sorrows of motherhood. When Normand “champ” died in July of 1985. She bravely persevered as a young widow with so many decisions forced upon her. She selflessly undertook with devotion, the care of our ailing father until he died in January of 1996. She was able to turn to her brother ray nicknamed "Sonny", for comfort and advice, until he died February 28, 2004.

I feel blessed to have known my sister all these 78 years. We used to joke about her being older than me by 15 minutes. That’s what my father told us any way.

She was quite popular in school and had many loyal friends. She had this ability to relate to people. She got along with every one.

We had our ups and downs, but we both knew we always shared a special bond. I looked up to her; she made me feel like a better person when I was around her. It takes a special person to make those around them feel great. Pauline did that with ease.

We enjoyed the bird feeder outside her window and marveled at the gold finches hovering about. It was a joy to share her enthusiasm.

Many thanks to Debi for being there whenever she needed anything; she certainly was a devoted daughter-in-law.

I love you so much Pauline. Thank you for being my twin sister.

I would like to close with a poem by Melinda Sue Pacho

Do not stand at my grave and forever weep.
I am not there; I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn’s rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and forever cry.
I am not there. I did not die"